Allah says in the Quran:
يَوَدُّ الْمُجْرِمُ لَوْ يَفْتَدِي مِنْ عَذَابِ يَوْمِئِذٍ بِبَنِيهِ ﴿١١﴾ وَصَاحِبَتِهِ وَأَخِيهِ ﴿١٢﴾ وَفَصِيلَتِهِ الَّتِي تُؤْوِيهِ ﴿١٣﴾ وَمَنْ فِي الْأَرْضِ جَمِيعًا ثُمَّ يُنْجِيهِ ﴿١٤﴾ كَلَّا ۖ إِنَّهَا لَظَىٰ ﴿١٥﴾
“The criminal will wish that he could be ransomed from the punishment of that Day by his children, and his wife and his brother, and his nearest kindred who sheltered him, and whoever is on earth entirely, so then it could save him. No! Indeed, it is a flame of Hell.”
— Surah Al-Ma’arij: 11-15
A person often loses his lifetime by focusing immensely on gathering worldly wealth for his wife and children. Moreover, earning through bribery, corruption, and dishonest means is all done to amass wealth for the family!
Therefore, the family becomes the reason for falling short in one’s duties toward Allah in this world.
The wealth he seeks and the family he loves make him forgetful of his Lord. But Allah explains in the Quran how this love and those who are loved will be on the Day of Resurrection:
فَإِذَا نُفِخَ فِي الصُّورِ فَلَا أَنْسَابَ بَيْنَهُمْ يَوْمَئِذٍ وَلَا يَتَسَاءَلُونَ
“Then, when the Trumpet is blown, there will be no kinship among them that Day, nor will they ask about one another.”
— Surah Al-Mu’minun: 101
The same God who granted love in the form of a husband, wife, children, and relatives will remove these bonds of affection from everyone on the Day of Resurrection.
The affection we feel for someone in this world due to relationships will not exist on that Day. Instead, people will run away upon seeing one another. On that Day, no one can attain any benefit from anyone else, except for the good deeds they have gathered for themselves.
On the Day of Judgement, every soul will be in fear regarding what its final destination will be; no one there will be worried about helping anyone else.
Regarding this, Allah says in the Quran:
فَمَنْ ثَقُلَتْ مَوَازِينُهُ فَأُولَٰئِكَ هُمُ الْمُفْلِحُونَ ﴿١٠٢﴾ وَمَنْ خَفَّتْ مَوَازِينُهُ فَأُولَٰئِكَ الَّذِينَ خَسِرُوا أَنْفُسَهُمْ فِي جَهَنَّمَ خَالِدُونَ ﴿١٠٣﴾
“Then those whose scales (of good deeds) are heavy—it is they who are the successful. And those whose scales are light—those are the ones who have lost their souls, remaining in Hell forever.”
— Surah Al-Mu’minun: 102, 103
Just as children utilize the property and wealth amassed by their parents after them in this world, the deeds of the parents will be of no use to the children in the Hereafter. On the Day of Resurrection, parents will flee in terror upon seeing their children, and children will flee in terror upon seeing their parents.
The Prophet (PBUH) said:
“Every one of you is a guardian and every one of you will be questioned about those under his guardianship.”
— Bukhari
Just as it is the responsibility of the head of the family to save his family from the poverty and hardships of this world, it is also his responsibility to save them from the torment of Hellfire and the spiritual poverty of the Hereafter.
Allah commands in the Quran to warn and remind family members through the fear of Allah:
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا قُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًا
“O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire…”
— Surah At-Tahrim: 6
وَأَنْذِرْ عَشِيرَتَكَ الْأَقْرَبِينَ
“And warn your closest kindred.”
— Surah Ash-Shu’ara: 214
Relationships will not benefit a person by bringing him good deeds in any way on the Day of Resurrection.
Allah says in Quran,
يَوْمَ يَفِرُّ الْمَرْءُ مِنْ أَخِيهِ ﴿٣٤﴾ وَأُمِّهِ وَأَبِيهِ ﴿٣٥﴾ وَصَاحِبَتِهِ وَبَنِيهِ ﴿٣٦﴾ لِكُلِّ امْرِئٍ مِنْهُمْ يَوْمَئِذٍ شَأْنٌ يُغْنِيهِ ﴿٣٧
On the Day a man will flee from his brother, and his mother and his father, and his wife and his children. For every man, that Day, will be a matter occupying him so as to make him heedless of others.” — Surah Abasa: 34-37
Everyone is responsible for their own actions. Whatever one seeks in this world constitutes their own deeds. No one will bear the burden of another person’s good or bad deeds on the Day of Judgement.
Allah says in the Quran:
وَلَا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌ وِزْرَ أُخْرَىٰ ۚ وَإِنْ تَدْعُ مُثْقَلَةٌ إِلَىٰ حِمْلِهَا لَا يُحْمَلُ مِنْهُ شَيْءٌ وَلَوْ كَانَ ذَا قُرْبَىٰ
“And no bearer of burdens will bear the burden of another. And if a heavily laden soul calls [another] to [carry some of] its load, nothing of it will be carried, even if he should be a close relative.”
— Surah Fatir: 18
In this world, family members can share joys and sorrows with one another. However, no one can enter Paradise based solely on a relationship with someone else. Similarly, out of love for another, no one can endure someone else’s punishment in Hellfire.